Your child’s school calls to report that they noticed your child is having behavioral problems at school, and it’s impacting everyone in the class—Now, what do you do?
No parent wants to receive a negative report from school, as it can make you feel insecure about your parenting skills and worry about the consequences for bad behavior at school; however, these things happen more often than you might think. This is an opportunity to learn about your child’s unique needs, improve their classroom experience, and set them up for future success. There’s no need to worry! We’ll break down the steps on how to help a child with behavior problems at school in a bit.
We’ll also explore what your child’s behavior may be communicating and outline practical steps to create effective support systems for them—both at school and at home. Finally, we’ll discuss more extreme interventions, such as Individualized Education Plans (IEPs) and school behavior plans.
Helping a Child With Behavior Problems at School
If your child is acting up, appears disengaged, or exhibits another atypical behavior at school, this is often a subtle sign that they may be frustrated, anxious, struggling, overstimulated, or a specific need isn’t being met within their current environment.
In some cases, behavioral problems can be signs of underlying conditions, such as ADHD, specific learning disabilities, or other mental health issues.
ADHD behavior problems at school, for instance, can present as impulsiveness, inattentiveness, emotional dysregulation, or hyperactivity, which can impact a child’s ability to focus and perform at school.
Children who have learning disabilities or other mental health conditions may display a range of behaviors, from emotional outbursts to social withdrawal. In addition to this, your child may be experiencing emotional pain or low self-esteem and may not know how to communicate their needs.
Next, we’ll review the steps you can take to understand your child and the resources available to support them at home and school.
1. Identify Common Triggers
Sometimes, specific triggers are behind a behavior, such as stress or academic struggles. Triggers can also come from being tired or hungry. Start by asking your child how they feel before and during the concerning behavior. Use open-ended questions vs “yes or no” questions to encourage them to open up. You can begin by asking a lighthearted question about their day before diving into deeper topics, such as, “What was the best part of your day?”
2. Dig Deeper: Create a List of Questions for the Teacher and Staff
Before you make a decision concerning your child, it’s important to get the full story. Write a list of questions you can ask the teacher and support staff. An example of some questions you can ask is below:
- When and how often do they notice the behaviors happening? Is it during a certain class, at recess, lunch, or at certain times during the day?
- Are there any noticeable triggers that happen right before the behavior, such as interactions with certain classmates?
- What intervention techniques has the school implemented to address the behavior? Do any new strategies or interventions need to be put in place?
- Does the school recommend an assessment or other services to help your child behave better during the day?
3. Start a Conversation and Request a Meeting
Collaborating with your child’s teachers, school counselors, or specialists to assess your child’s needs is a good first step in creating an effective plan.
Having a strong support system in place ensures that your child can succeed in the classroom and at home. Setting up a meeting with the school staff as soon as possible will help everyone involved to align on the next steps forward and any early interventions or services needed.
Based on your conversation, the school’s clinical team may recommend a Functional Behavioral Assessment (FBA) in cases where further testing and observation are required to determine eligibility for services. These assessments can also be used as foundations to develop a school behavior plan, which we’ll cover in more detail later.
4. Schedule a Medical Evaluation (If Needed)
If you have concerns about a medical condition impacting your child’s success in the classroom, you can schedule a medical evaluation with their primary care provider to gain more clarity on the situation.
5. Ensure Routines at Home Mirror Goals at School
Consistency between home and school can significantly impact your child’s behavior and academic success. Start by establishing a consistent sleep schedule, homework routine, and daily habits that align with the school’s expectations.
Regularly check school-supported websites or communication platforms to stay informed about your child’s assignments, grades, and upcoming projects. Address missing assignments promptly and help your child prioritize tasks to reduce stress.
Incorporate family values about education, such as the importance of responsibility, effort, respect, communication, and respect for teachers, into everyday conversations. Reinforce positive behaviors and skills like managing emotions, following instructions, and completing tasks.
This alignment will help your child feel supported, reduce confusion, and reinforce positive behaviors across all settings.
6. Stay Involved
Regular communication with teachers, counselors, and other school staff helps ensure everyone is aligned on goals and strategies to support the child. Attending meetings, following up on strategies, and discussing progress can create a consistent approach between home and school.
By staying involved, you can advocate for your child’s needs, adjust strategies as needed, and reinforce positive behaviors, making a stronger impact on their success and well-being.
The Role of School Behavior Plans
If a Functional Behavioral Assessment (FBA) determines that greater support services are needed, the school may implement a 504 plan, a school behavior plan, or an Individualized Education Plan.
A school behavior plan is a customized plan tailored to your child’s specific needs, addressing their academic and behavioral goals. These types of plans are typically recommended in more substantial situations after preliminary interventions have been explored.
A student may qualify for a 504 Plan if they have a physical or mental impairment substantially limiting one or more major life activities (e.g., learning, walking, concentrating). This plan addresses how your child will have access to learning at school and any accommodations needed in the classroom, such as extended testing times or more frequent rest breaks.
As your child ages, behavior issues may not arise until their pre-teen years, such as middle school. Collaborating with your child’s school for middle school behavior management using the steps outlined previously can help mitigate greater challenges in high school.
At the high school level, tools such as a high school behavior contract may be recommended. High school behavior contracts are agreements between students, their parents or guardians, and school staff that outline specific behavioral expectations, consequences, and supports. These contracts often address persistent behavior issues, providing a clear structure to help students improve their actions while maintaining accountability.
Individualized Education Plans for Students With Disabilities
If a Functional Behavioral Assessment (FBA) reveals significant behavior challenges linked to a disability, your child may be eligible for an Individualized Education Plan (IEP). An IEP is a formalized plan combined with specialized instruction to support students with disabilities who require additional assistance to succeed in school. The IEP can incorporate strategies to address these issues, helping them manage behaviors that may impact learning.
An IEP is implemented when a child qualifies for special education services and outlines specific educational goals, accommodations, and support services customized to the student’s unique needs. An IEP is reviewed and updated annually, ensuring it’s up to date with your child’s progress and evolving needs.
Supporting Success
We understand that behavioral problems can impact all areas of your child’s life. Our experienced team at the Associated Clinic of Psychology offers school-based and community-based support services to provide comprehensive therapeutic services aimed at helping your child succeed at home and school.
For more information, request an appointment with us.
